How Faith Leads to Trust
Dena Johnson Dena's Devos
2014 15 Jul
“Trust
me with your heart.”
Those
words whispered to my heart continue to haunt me, and with each passing day I
reach a deeper and more complete understanding of what God meant.
I
feel as if life is spiralling out of control. God’s promise vanished from my
grip in a moment. My children are being forced to spend a large part of this summer
away from me. I am scared and lonely. My heart is being ripped to shreds. I do
not understand what God is doing.
But,
God continues to tell me that life is out of my control—but it certainly isn’t
out of his control. He continues to remind me that his ways are higher than my
ways, his thoughts are higher than my thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9). He continues to
remind me that when I can’t see his hand, I can still trust his heart. He keeps
reminding me to focus my eyes on him, to be still and know that he is God
(Psalm 46:10).
Despite
the fear, pain, and loneliness, I am reminded that God always has a purpose in
the pain. No trial is wasted, and if we cooperate with God, trials always
produce fruit. I have been begging God to show me the purpose of this pain, to
open my eyes to what he wants in this time. And, I am beginning to get a sense
of anticipation for what he is doing.
I
am beginning to see that this momentary trial—as difficult and painful as it
may be right now—is actually a set up. God is setting the stage to step in and
show himself mighty in my life. He is preparing the way to do things that only
he can do, things that will point others directly back to him. He is working in
my heart to develop not only faith—but also a trust in him even when life
simply doesn’t make sense.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight
(Proverbs 3:5-6).
God
has spent the last four years building my faith. The journey has been
unbelievable! In the last two years especially, I have been stretched beyond
what I ever imagined possible. He has brought me to a place where I truly
believe he is able to do above and beyond all I could ever ask or imagine
(Ephesians 3:20-21). He has taught me to hear his voice and believe what he has
to say. I am at a place where I hear the whispers of God, I recognize his voice
immediately, and I then walk in obedience. And, I have an anticipation of
seeing God show up.
But
now, God is moving from teaching me faith to teaching me trust.
I
had never considered the difference between faith and trust, but I am beginning
to understand. Faith is a strong belief in someone or something without logical
proof. But, trust is a firm reliance on the character or integrity of another.
I’ve developed a faith in God—a belief that he is able. Now, he is trying to
teach me to totally and completely rely on him.
In
recent weeks, my world was rocked when a promise I’ve been clinging to for two
years seemed to vanish, walked away, became completely impossible—humanly
impossible. I believed God was able when it looked as if it could be a reality,
when I thought I could make it happen on my own. But now, I can’t do anything
to make this promise become a reality. I must fully and completely rely on God
to do the work.
I’m
beginning to realize that I’ve been leaning on my own understanding. To fully
trust God with all my heart, I have to be willing to lean into him when life no
longer makes sense. I have to be willing to trust him when life is spiralling
out of control, when everything of value has been stripped away. I have to
learn to trust that God is still able when I am not. I have to trust that every
single pain and trial becomes a holy hammer to mould me into his image.
As
I walk daily through the fire, I see how much work God still has to do in my
life—how much growth I have left in the areas of faith and trust. I truly want
to be fully devoted to him, to live my life in a way that takes full advantage of
all the goodness he offers to us as Christians. Even though I know better, I
want to have the blissfully happy life that we tend to imagine.
But
I am learning that the abundant life can be ours even when circumstances are
against us. I am learning to trust that God is sovereign and has a purpose in
every pain. I am learning that if I seek his face in every situation, he will
show me what he has for me. I am learning to be content in any and all
circumstances. I am learning to trust him even when it seems dangerous.
What
is God doing? I really don’t know. But I know that he sees the entire
picture—from start to finish. He has ordained all my days even before I took my
first breath (Psalm 139:16). I am a masterpiece created by him to do good works
that he has already prepared for me to do (Ephesians 2:10). I am learning that
he can do anything and no plan of his can be thwarted (Job 42:2). I am learning
to wait for Yahweh and put my hope in his work (Psalm 130:5).
Even
though I can’t fully understand his ways, even though I can’t grasp what he is
doing behind the scenes, I know that he is taking everything and weaving into a
beautiful mosaic for my good (Romans 8:28). He is my all-seeing, all-knowing
Father who loves me so much; therefore, I can trust him.
As
difficult as it can sometimes be, isn’t it better to trust our lives to the One
who can see the finished picture? Isn’t it better to trust the One who has the
full perspective from beginning to end? Isn’t it better to let him fight our
battles, to let him figure out how he is going to finish the work he has begun?
I’m
tired of fighting. Today, I choose to trust.
Dena
Johnson is a busy single mom of three kids who loves God passionately. She
delights in taking the everyday events of life, finding God in them, and
impressing them on her children as they sit at home or walk along the way
(Deuteronomy 6:7). Her greatest desire is to be a channel of God’s comfort and
encouragement. You can read more of Dena’s experiences with her Great I AM on
her blog Dena's Devos.